YouTube Mix (playlist)

THE AMBITION TALK

It's been a pretty hectic life since my husband met with that unfortunate incident ... Started off with just a normal weekend routine, to send our 12-year-old son to his tuition center,  fell off the bike and he broke his left leg joint (behind the knee cap).  He had to undergo a surgery that caused us RM10K.  Lesson learned:  Be sure to remind your husband that he should always remember to pay his insurance installment because shit happens and you'll never know exactly when it'll come your way ...  This evening, I just want to share a story on 'our' (Rizal and me) conversation with our children.  It's about our 'ambition'... Back in high school, during our SPM & STPM years, Rizal wanted to become a 'Rock Star' and I wanted to become the 'Prime Minister' (Don't laugh! I had my own reason for wanting to become one!)

... and so, I confessed to my children and my husband that once upon a time, I had an ambition to be the Prime Minister (or at least a Minister / a Member of Parliament).  I was really naive at that time ... Back then, there was no Internet.  I love to read English books, magazines, newspaper and the only source I could get about the local politicians was only through reading local newspaper, magazines and my 'circle of friends'...

Among the Malay magazines that I enjoyed reading were Wanita and Jelita.  My mom used to buy it every month to get the recipes ... and I enjoyed reading them because my friends at school kept on reminding me to read about their family success story, some coverage on their father / mom and their siblings' wedding, etc.     

Back in high school, I never knew that my friends were those VIP / VVIP children.  I attended high school in a convent and everybody wore school uniform ... everybody appeared the same ... everybody read / did the same things and went to the same places to hangout ... HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW???

To cut it short, we used to hang out together.  Sometimes, at home to watch video tapes that we rented (for budget weekends - just make some pop-corn, buy some carbonated drinks and fry some french fries) and voila!  How much more fun can we ask for?  Number one rule, we must be extra polite when conversing with our parents.  Be it my parents or their parents ...

It's so happened that most of my friends were children of some royalty or VIPs.  They love to befriend me because they like to come to my house and enjoy my mom's cooking.  My house is the only place that their parents would allow to go without much questioning.  I guess, their parents trusted my mom "The Great General" LOL (mak saya adalah manusia paling garang dalam dunia, sampai sekarang saya takut kat dia) :P

I told my children, back then, I wanted to become a Minister because they live a happy life and can spend money lavishly (bodohnya saya masa tu, manalah saya tahu duit bukan segala-galanya). Sambung cerita kat anak-anak, at that time, what I understood was 'to become a minister, you have to be a university graduate'. You have to be a doctor (like Tun), or take up Economics (like Rafidah Aziz or my Pak Adam), or take up Geography from UM (like my Uncle Ramli).  Those were the only 'reference' I had back then.  Therefore, when my parents asked me to apply for Teachers Training at Maktab, I secretly trashed the form into the dustbin and enrolled myself into ITM instead.  Got my diploma as a stepping stone and along the way, I take up this Bach. of Edu. in TESL bla bla bla and become and English teacher.

Hence, I told my children, parents normally know their children's potential better.  My parents jenis takde masa nak bagi guide pasal belajar2 ni.  Tak macam kita di zaman skarang.  However, my parents knew my potential, they advised me to enroll myself into the Maktab Perguruan (Teachers Training College) but I secretly defy them.  Padan muka, akhirnya, jadi cikgu jugak!

On the other hand, as the 80s teenager who grew up in the countryside, the FELDA settlement to be exact, my husband wanted to become a Rock Star LOL (tetiba, teringat movie Mamat Khalid yg kelakar tu)... My husband told our children, despite of wanting to become a Rock Star, he did not defy his parents.  Dia masuk jugaklah maktab perguruan tu.  He told our children, he scored in all his examination because he worked hard, and prayed hard too.  Buat solat hajat setiap malam.  Mak dia pun selalu doakan dia.  Tak pernah study last minute, kena tahu teknik belajar bla bla bla

Pokok pangkalnya, walaupun pada zaman 80an dulu, kami tak pegi tuition, tapi kami boleh je lulus exam.  Tonight, I told my children how slow I am ... I told them I am not as smart as their father ... I re-emphasized on SOLAT, on mengaji AL-QURAN, on the 'study skill' that they need to have, pasal solat hajat tu pun betul (it's just that I only started doing it during my degree years)... Jenis lambat dapat hidayah kot ... AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST, DOA IBU KITA + NIAT BELAJAR TU, MESTILAH KERANA ALLAH ... pegilah kolej / sekolah kat langit ke tujuh sekalipun, kalau niat tak betul , maka tak betul lah hasilnya ... Bila dah kerja, kerjalah betul2 ... takut duit yang patutnya halal, jadi haram sebab mencuri tulang, ponteng, kerja mengelat, etc. 

In then end, I'm not sure if my children understood what we were telling them ... Tapi, sekurang-kurangnya, mereka dah ada cita2 masing2.  Kami sebagai parents, kenalah bagi panduan kat mereka, doakan mereka and tawakal... Sorrylah, harini, bahasa rojak sikit ... Niat di hati nak tulis dalam BM sepenuhnya, tapi, malu pulak sebab tadi, masa nak cakap 'guide' dalam BMpun tak ingat apa perkataannya, sampai anak2 pun gelakkan kita.  Apa2 halpun, I love you very much ... semoga kamu berjaya dunia akhirat Amiiiiiiin

My New Sweet Pink Girlish Fountain Pen

While doing some spring cleaning and filing at my desk, I found the fountain pen I bought close to 2 years ago.  It's pink in color, made of plastic and I bought it for numerous reasons.  Firstly, because I found it very cute and girlish (it reminds me of my childhood and a friend who goes bonkers each time she sees anything in pink).  Secondly, because it's cheap but branded - worth wasting the money for LOL (coz I've lost several expensive fountain pens - thanks to Mr. Hubby).  Thirdly, writing with fountain pen makes my writing appears beautiful, classical and  very European!  Vane!  Yes, I am vane :P

And so I placed the ink cartridge in (so modern, unlike those pens I used to have which ink had to be sucked in with a pinch at the ink tube). I began to write to test the quality of this fountain pen I bought two years ago.  It doesn't appear to be as I expected.  However, it's enough to serve as a pleasant reminder of my late father and Aki.

The whole family writes / wrote in cursive writing with fountain pens that each of us proudly owned.  Unfortunately, I cannot write to my sons in English like my father used to correspond with us.  They are just kampung boys that attend rural primary school.

However, I just hold on to what my father used to say ... "It's the spice of life..."  :)

Love you Ayah...